Sally's Blog

Rainy Manhattan

October 15th, 2009

downpour-300x299.jpgI sit here at the counter of a Starbucks on the Upper West Side, watching Manhattan roll by in the rain. Through the picture window is a constant flow of taxis, cars, pedestrians, strollers, nannies, and the occasional leashed dog. Most of the umbrellas are black. I just saw a synthetic tan toupe go by. Everyone looks so serious. I wonder if they would smile more if they carried colorful umbrellas.

I’m in familiar territory. Michael and I lived 20 blocks south of here as newlyweds and later, as new parents. This area of Broadway and Columbus marks my well-worn path, when I slipped Harrison into the stroller and walked to the local Duane Reade on Broadway, often followed by Citarella, Read the rest of this entry »

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We Clean

October 12th, 2009

housecleaning“You know, you have to do your housecleaning chores before you can play.”

Harrison, Olivia, my niece Stephanie, and I were enjoying a Saturday morning pancake breakfast at the dining room table. We love it when Stephanie spends the weekend with us.  At 25 years old, Stephanie, who lives in Daly City, brings a special effervescence to our household. She somehow manages to be both an adult and a playful child. One moment she and I are sitting on the sofa, talking about spirituality and philosophy, and an hour later I spot her climbing out of a steep incline of bushes, pulling twigs out of her hair, holding high a red rubber ball.   Read the rest of this entry »

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Direction

October 7th, 2009

past-present-future

I am back from my Chicago trip. It was one of those experiences where I was so many places at once – in my head, anyhow. Eckhart Tolle would not have been impressed.

There were many triggers to my past, starting with the air. The atmosphere in the Midwest is different from the air in California – particularly the crisp, autumn air that welcomed me every day in Chicago. One step outside the door and I was transported to the mounds of fall leaves my siblings and I used to take a half-hour to pile high, only to destroy them with jumps, stomps, and raucous throws.

Staying with my friends, Adam and Joyce, and their 18-month old brought me back to my days as a young mother, nurturing toddlers. The sentimental side of me idealized the loveliness of living life with a little one, their little hands grasping mine, Read the rest of this entry »

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Leaving and Arriving

October 2nd, 2009

PLANE_blue_skyIf there is one thing I wish I could tell my children about my book tours it is this: I really, really, really dislike traveling without them. Really. But I can’t let them know just how difficult it is for me to leave, or I would put them in the role of parent, and they would be forced to make me feel better about my travel.

It already happened once. Harrison heard me murmuring about not wanting to travel for this trip to Chicago, which is centered on a 2-hour interview on WGN. I also wasn’t sure about a ten day NYC-Boston trip a week later.

“Why are you walking around, scratching your head?” Harrison asked, seated at the dining room table creating animation forms. Read the rest of this entry »

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Inside the Book Club

October 1st, 2009

bookclubI had the privilege of being a guest speaker at a local book group two days ago. My friend Eileen, who sought me out years ago when a mutual friend told her I wanted to feel more connected to a Jewish community, hosted the event. This wasn’t just any book group. It was a gathering of nine women who have been meeting for a decade, discussing books written on Jewish topics.

Second to writing The New Jew, the most gratifying part of being published is discussions with readers. Tuesday’s book group was no exception. Each of these women was a member of the Jewish Federation of the East Bay. They were committed to Jewish causes, to furthering their understanding of Jewish issues, and were clearly loyal to each other. I marveled at how I somehow was made to feel included in their banter and familiarity. It reminded me of the qualities of the Jewish culture that drew me in nearly twenty years ago — inclusiveness, intellect and humor among them.

“Before we begin talking about the book,” Susan said in her irresistible Texan drawl, “we want to know what has happened between your conversion and now.” Everyone nodded. I wondered if they heard my gulp. Read the rest of this entry »

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Clouds

September 25th, 2009

tree-in-fogI awoke this morning to a thick shroud of fog enveloping my house. For nearly a week now I’ve awakened to fog. My house sits high on stilts, overlooking the land, communing with the treetops that neighbor it. We are equals, the trees and I. Like a child who finally reaches eye level to his parents, I feel lucky to look so squarely into the branches of my trees.

But today the branches were mere silhouettes, and the city, the view from my windows, was concealed behind a milky white sky.

Recently a friend asked me if I liked the fog. ”Like it?” I answered. “I love it!” It brings me back to my suburban childhood in Milwaukee, where fog was a rare experience. I remember looking out my window to see our quiet street to see it blanketed in gray. Read the rest of this entry »

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Abundance

September 23rd, 2009

abundanceIt was quite a day. Not only is it the High Holy Days – my favorite time of year – it also happens to be my birthday. It is absolutely impossible to feel anything but joy and abundance on this day. I have to wonder what I did to deserve such loving people in my life.

I think it is magical how, through life cycle events, the meaning of life becomes so simple. I experience it a births, funerals, b’nei mitzvahs, weddings, our family retreat…. and my birthday gives me the same reminder. The only thing in life that matters is love. It’s just not that complicated.

And today was not about quantity, but quality. Read the rest of this entry »

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Coed Again

September 11th, 2009

ucla-dorm-roomI have a birthday coming up in two weeks. This seems significant to me at this moment, as I sit in a dorm room at UCLA for a writer’s conference. Because it strikes me that, the older I get, the more I stay the same.

Take tonight, for instance. I am alone in my room, two twin beds divided by a low bureau, a desk on either side of the beds. I am stretched out in my sweats, my laptop on my legs, books strewn all about me. I am working on a final paper for grad school. When I was an undergrad, I would have been sitting at my desk, clacking away on typewriter keys, but the scene is otherwise identical to my undergrad days.

Shockingly, so are my thought processes. Read the rest of this entry »

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On the Road

September 9th, 2009

IMG_0217The lazy summer days are over. This is evidenced by my family calendar. It is the latest addition to our hallway decor. Some have family photos, others framed artwork or posters. The Friedes family? We have a 24×36 laminated calendar with four colors of penmanship scrawled across sixty squares.

This is a new system for us. It was spawned by a classic Mom Mess Up.

“Mom, it’s minimum day,” Olivia’s sweet voice came through my phone.

I looked at my watch. I needed to pick her up from school in precisely 30 minutes – about 3 hours earlier than I had planned. Read the rest of this entry »

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Tickling Leo

September 3rd, 2009

26556811_I recently had the privilege to review a soon-to-be-released film. Called Tickling Leo, it was described as a film set around the days of Yom Kippur – a contemporary drama that follows three generations of one Jewish family whose secrets threaten to wipe away its future.

Who could resist a plot like that?

One of the qualities about the Jewish culture that captivated me was the bond to family and the value of heritage –  much more than I experienced in my own upbringing. While I loved my grandparents, I never felt terribly close to them, nor did I have a sense of being part of  ”a people.” The same cannot be said of Jewish people. I felt it immediately when I met my in-laws, and I experienced it among friends. They all had a sense of belonging well beyond their immediate families.

But what the two cultures share, and dare I say what Western Civilization fosters, is a lack of connection to our personal histories. Read the rest of this entry »

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